This weeks post is exactly what it says on the tin. I was struck down by the evil, painful, and horrifying disease known as man flu this week. Although, I am now over joyed to report, I survived man flu!
What the eagle eyed readers among you may have noticed is that I missed my Sunday deadline for the Stories Of A Dad Weekly. For that I am very sorry. My reason for this, well despite the serious illness I contracted earlier in the week. I was simply having too much fun yesterday to get anything written down.
Shall we begin..
As normal the week started off as repetitive as always, although by Tuesday afternoon I was struggling to do even the most menial of tasks. Tripping over my own feet, even more than usual. My bones ached like a buffalo had used me as a trampoline and my ears, nose, mouth, throat and just about every part of my head and shoulders (not an ad!) were in a dire state.
It was at this point I conceded defeat and phoned into work. Even when you’re legitimately ill, that phone call is always a nerve wracking experience. Once you hang up, I imagine they just turn around and do the classic *cough, cough* “Bullshit!”.
I ended up being bed ridden and sofa bound for the rest of the week. Only peeking up towards the middle of Saturday.
When you’re a parent though, your duties never really stop, do they. School was a god send this week. I think if I’d had a three foot tall shadow climbing on me all day, my recovery would have been less than impressive.
Saturday night brought Chelsea’s works Christmas Party. In January! I hear you ask. Well, yes actually. She works in the retail industry and December is always a manic time for those guys. So, I guess the boss decided to hold the buffet until after the madness dies down.
With a party comes the getting ready. I love watching Chels get ready for a night out. She always says she has nothing to wear, but always finds something stunning. Her make up always ‘runs out’ and it’s always my fault! ‘Cos I wear foundation and know precisely what contouring is.. Yep! So even with the last nano grams of make up she finds, she always looks flawless. The sound track is a mixture of hair dryers and 90’s R&B, it’s like a Whitney Houston dressing room in there. Then she appears in all her beauty looking like fire! Pronounced FI-Ya! (That’s a good thing by the way.)
I had the company of her friends partner, and my chum Dan for the evening. We chatted like pensioners in the paper shop into the night only pausing for a moment to inhale some of the finest Turkish cuisine known to man. Meat and Chips, in case you were wondering.
The girls eventually bundled in the front door just before 1am, full of prosecco, and giggling blissfully. A good night by all accounts.
Waking up on Sunday to a hung over Chels, who had her best friends surprise baby shower to attend in the afternoon was fun. Searching the house for anything edible to soak up some of the alcohol. Me and Bo were finding her rather entertaining.
As Chels headed off to the baby shower, me and Bobby set off in search for adventure. Apparently us guys were exempt from showering the baby, or what ever it is women do at these things.
Me and my miniature Indiana Jones headed to an old favourite, Knole Park. A national trust site on the boarder of Kent and Surrey. We’ve been here a few times before so we know what to expect. Vast rolling hills, great big oak trees and herds of majestic fallow deer. We even caught a glimpse of some parrots doing some kind of aerial display.
We were wandering around in the brush trying to get close to the big guys, as Bobby calls them. By ‘big guys’ he means the ones with the biggest antlers on their head. To any onlookers we probably looked like a pair of idiots, but to us we were in a David Attenborough documentary. One of my favourite thing is to be out in the wilderness with Bobby. Exploring fallen trees and dodging deer poop.
We finished our adventure with Bobby’s choice, heading for a pub lunch on the way to collect Chels from the shower. Baby, not actual shower.
After a struggle earlier in the week, we finished off with a great adventure, some fresh air and some family time. Fully recovered from my great plague. What more could we ask for.
Until next week, when I’ll hopefully be on time.
Have a magnificent week.