So I’ll start left off in last week’s Stories Of A Dad Weekly. At the very beginning of our Great British holiday. We had already embarked on a 202 mile road trip to the north stopping with some family before heading into the shires.

We packed up and left their’s just after breakfast on Monday morning. Hitting the road with another 129 miles to do. I’m not going to lie, I was finding the driving very tedious by now.

Once we got to our destination, having passed glamorous places such as Manchester, Liverpool, and Preston along the way. We eventually arrived in the overcast town of Morecambe!

Incredibly punctual as always. We were 2 hours earlier for check in. With this wait on our agenda we decided to drive around the local area on a standard holiday reconnaissance mission. Which goes something like this; “Oh, there’s a Londis.” “Wow, petrols expensive up ‘ere.” and obviously at the sight of McDonald’s, “Well, at least we’ve found breakfast!”

We eventually found somewhere to do a food shop. We were self catering, so we had to get some essentials in. Also we definitely are not millionaires, and I’m not inclined to pay £14 for a kids burger at the camp restaurant every night.

Once we were all checked in we took the short drive around the holiday park and found our weeks accommodation. ‘Chateaux De La Morecambe’ is what I liked to call it. ‘Static caravan’ I believe is the official term. Just enough room to house the three of us for the time we were there.

Interestingly, there was no number 6. We were 8, our neighbours 7 and the one before them was 5. This was a hot topic of discussion for about 3 minutes. The mystery of caravan number 6 remains unsolved.

Knackered after the travel so far, we had a quiet first night, spent some coppers in the arcades, watched a man in a dog suit dance around on stage, then headed back to our villa for the night.

Tuesday – I was very pleased. We were heading to explore the Lake District! I have the fondest of memories of that area, and also I love wind, rain and countryside.. Chelsea however, does not.

A gorgeous drive with the ever looming hills coming ever closer. What were silhouettes on the horizon were now clear peaks wearing cloudy hats. We made it through Kendal, headed north along the Lake Windermere coast road, through Ambleside. A few miles past and I remembered I’d seen a waterfall that was in Ambleside and decided that is it what we were there for. I didn’t tell Chels or Bobby this until, well, until I was lost and needed six eyes instead of two. It came to light that the waterfalls were only accessed by foot. Or at least that’s what the Regatta jacket and walking boot masses would suggest.

Anyway, we found our selves on a road called Kirkstone Pass, high in the hills looking deep into the valley below. Simply beautiful, striking landscape. Incredibly windy too. I pulled up in a lay by and we got out. Surrounded by stunningly crafted drystone walls.

Chelsea’s door nearly came off in the gusts and Bobby became a kite! In that moment stood on the peak with my beautiful family, I was ecstatic. She’ll never admit it but Chels definitely liked it up there!

Wednesday brought with it a trip to Blackpool Zoo. Blackpool is but a stones throw away from where we were in the grand scheme of our road trip and we hadn’t been since both Chelsea and I were kids so wanted to visit. The zoo came about by way of logical thinking. The pleasure Beach was an option, however Bobby wouldn’t have been able to go on the ‘big’ rides and we didn’t wanna disappoint. I used some of our Tesco Clubcard points to put towards the cost of admission. 25p was all we had to pay. 25p for a trip to one of the best and most interactive zoo’s we’ve been to. With great vantage points and active animals. We were able to see some real legends of the animal kingdom up close. Really close, especially when they were all ‘cuddling’.

Chelsea’s highlight was seeing her beloved Giraffes, Bobby’s the lion playing football, and myself, well I just wanna be friends with a silver back gorilla. It was at this zoo that a peacock took a rampant dislike to me. I was in fear of my life when that b*stard chased me. You can watch the video over on my Instagram stories if you like.

Blackpool Zoo, a great example of conservation in my eyes.

Our weeks adventure was drawing to a close, we decide to explore the town that had hosted us. Morecambe was subtle and endearing. But like most British seaside towns, has had to weather the storms of years gone by. With a tiny town centre and short promenade it’s timid in its appeal. But we made the most of what they had on offer. Strolls along the prom, collecting shells and watching the sun set.

As the finale of our trip was approaching we spent some time in the pool, exchanged our tokens from the arcades. We found time for a few more games of air hockey and got round to packing.

We had elected to drive back during the night as we didn’t fancy sitting in Friday motorway traffic all day. We set off on the return leg at 7:15pm. Bobby nodding off shortly after that. Exhausted no doubt from an action packed fun filled week.

As the hours on the road flew by me and Chels found our selves talking about random things in an effort to keep each other awake. This come to a point when we were approaching the M6 toll road at around 10pm. Sat Nav was saying take it, I was saying no. Needless to say £5.90 later we were chugging a long an empty motorway for no reason. Much later, I needed a rest. Pulling into Oxford services we had made great progress. After a little rest, leg stretch and a yawn we were ready to set off yet again. The rest was obviously not enough! I took the wrong exist on the junction and began our journey back the way we had came. Towards Birmingham. 17 miles until the next junction. We live in Kent! Not Birmingham!

An eternity had past, we reached our home and simply bailed out and hit the hay. 1:30am!

After an epic road trip of 917 miles, the furthest north I’d ever driven myself. Some funny stories and great memories have come from our trip.

I really hope you enjoyed my account of our adventure. I am now looking forward to the next one!

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