Raising a child is not an easy task. I know, stating the obvious there, but it really isn’t.
There have been a number of occasions in the past few weeks that I have come to realise this more and more, I’ll come back to this shortly.
The first couple of years of raising a child are pretty simple in my experience. Feed, change, entertain, love, sleep. In the most simplistic of ways those are the few things a youngster requires you to provide.
Once they reach the age of speaking and listening it’s a whole different ball game. We have always had people comment on how well behaved Bobby is and how he’s “a credit to us.” Or “He’s been good as gold” etc. Which he is, to be honest me and Chels are some of luckiest parents on the planet. He truly is a little gentleman.
The only times he becomes naughty, and acts like an actually demon child are when we are tired too. His behaviour very rarely turns bad. For that we are so grateful.
We haven’t really done anything special in his up bringing other than teach him manners, and allow him to speak and be heard, we have always had full and flourishing conversations with him, so he always feels part of a discussion or decision. I think this allows him to understand our points of view more. Thus being more understanding of discipline.
A kids behaviour is always changing, as they grow older, it is something that they will continue to challenge, and will always push the boundaries around new rules. So don’t bury your heads in the sand, you as parents are their role models.
Going back to these few occasions over the past few weeks that have really made me question how kids are being raised.
I get a call most mornings from Chels after Bo has been picked up for school. As per the normal chit chat about how Bobby spent 45 minutes running round the house in just a sock before getting ready in his uniform. However one day last week it was different, Chels told me how they stood in their normal spot waiting, they were joined by a group of boys 14-15 years old, who proceeded to start spitting, swearing, and dropping their rubbish on the floor. Within feet of Bobby, a very impressionable 5 year old. What happened next makes me immensely proud and content, Bobby spoke up, stood there at a towering 2ft tall he remarks at how “those boys are naughty, they shouldn’t be doing that..” he said out loud to his mummy that “littering is bad and there’s a bin for that..”. So I wonder if our 5 year old knows it’s wrong, what happened to these boys manners?
Another occasion, was at our very own school gates, a boy spitting again, (Spitting, in my opinion is one of, if not the most discussing things you can do!) Luckily Bobby wasn’t by my side and didn’t see this. The boys mum however was, and didn’t even bat an eyelid! What is that about?
Now I know some of you will be thinking, why didn’t you say something? Answer, In short, I don’t want the grief. I know I shouldn’t feel that way, but it’s hard enough explaining to your own child what right and wrong, let alone someone else’s.
So this is why I say raising a child is bloody hard work, even before all the influences of other people and their behaviour.
Why is bad behaviour some how cool? If it’s not cool, why does it seem to be socially acceptable? If it’s not socially acceptable, why do people not behaviour as such?
Some words to live by.. “What have you done today, to make you feel proud?” – Heather Small.